A reply to a girls blog on another shiduch blogger
I am a Bochur of over 40, my younger siblings are B"H married & have kids & learn in Eretz Yisroel. I was a better learner than them, but my situation forced me to work. I try to help in tuition fees for my YOUNGER brother's kids.
I always tell my father that: the fact my clock stopped, doesn't mean Klal Yisroel should stop, and certainly not my younger brothers.
Yes people are mean. Imagine having to daven with out a Talis & being the oldest one in Shul, with a graying beard. Yes every day!
Do I get broken, I am human, I am sensitive, and I find it hard to forgive sometimes.
However how you can let your guard down like that?
WE don’t run the world, nor do we understand why we came here, who said we were brought here to have a family & children, of course we want one.
Stop and think, maybe not have children and accepting the L-ord’s decree is more choshuv by HKB”H, than having a family & children. HKB”H can show the world that he is boss through you. See Tania (IGERES HAKODESH 11, BTW I AM NOT A CHABADNIC).
Just use common sense alone; what do you gain by being depressed or jealous does it bring you any good? It ruins you. Who wants to marry a depressed bitter jealous lady/or man for that matter?
Get out of your rut!! Break yourself to help others, “Fagin” Fagin & Fagin again. You will feel better, & you see Yeshuas Hashem Kehref Ayin.
Remember your real Tachlis is to want what Hashem wants for you.
HKB”H doesn’t need your help, and knows a lot better than you what is good for you. When you say Krias Shema be Mekabel Oil Malchus Shomayim, and be prepared to die any death or [not even die] suffer any suffering to sanctify the name of the L-ord. Mean what you say, and think how lucky you really are to go through “Busha “[embarrassment] equivalent to Shfichas Domim [murder] so as to sanctify the name of the L-ord.
Think of all the times you died out of embarrassment, and you still accept the L-ord’s judgments & decrees.
How many of your happily married friends could really mean Shema Yisroel like you could? How much Nachas you give HKB”H from your Shema more than Malochim & Serofim.
Why feel empty you are the world & the world stands on you? You have a private agreement between you & HKB”H. “Btach Bashem Vasei Tov Shchon Boretz Ureah Emuna”.
That is how I feel, [a Bochur over 40] it is very likely I have been rejected by you based on my age, never the less I am not bitter. I pray please HKB”H don’t let the situation rule me, let me continue to rule it.
I always tell my father that: the fact my clock stopped, doesn't mean Klal Yisroel should stop, and certainly not my younger brothers.
Yes people are mean. Imagine having to daven with out a Talis & being the oldest one in Shul, with a graying beard. Yes every day!
Do I get broken, I am human, I am sensitive, and I find it hard to forgive sometimes.
However how you can let your guard down like that?
WE don’t run the world, nor do we understand why we came here, who said we were brought here to have a family & children, of course we want one.
Stop and think, maybe not have children and accepting the L-ord’s decree is more choshuv by HKB”H, than having a family & children. HKB”H can show the world that he is boss through you. See Tania (IGERES HAKODESH 11, BTW I AM NOT A CHABADNIC).
Just use common sense alone; what do you gain by being depressed or jealous does it bring you any good? It ruins you. Who wants to marry a depressed bitter jealous lady/or man for that matter?
Get out of your rut!! Break yourself to help others, “Fagin” Fagin & Fagin again. You will feel better, & you see Yeshuas Hashem Kehref Ayin.
Remember your real Tachlis is to want what Hashem wants for you.
HKB”H doesn’t need your help, and knows a lot better than you what is good for you. When you say Krias Shema be Mekabel Oil Malchus Shomayim, and be prepared to die any death or [not even die] suffer any suffering to sanctify the name of the L-ord. Mean what you say, and think how lucky you really are to go through “Busha “[embarrassment] equivalent to Shfichas Domim [murder] so as to sanctify the name of the L-ord.
Think of all the times you died out of embarrassment, and you still accept the L-ord’s judgments & decrees.
How many of your happily married friends could really mean Shema Yisroel like you could? How much Nachas you give HKB”H from your Shema more than Malochim & Serofim.
Why feel empty you are the world & the world stands on you? You have a private agreement between you & HKB”H. “Btach Bashem Vasei Tov Shchon Boretz Ureah Emuna”.
That is how I feel, [a Bochur over 40] it is very likely I have been rejected by you based on my age, never the less I am not bitter. I pray please HKB”H don’t let the situation rule me, let me continue to rule it.
posted by Shiduchim Crisis at 5:09 PM
4 Comments:
the blog name was frumandsingle.blogspot
EVEN MY FATHER HAD A BEARD BEFORE HIS MARRIAGE UNTRIMMED. My beard is 25 years old untrimmed.If I shave it off now I will get the stares, feel very guilty & not get the shiduch I would feel comfortable with.
So your advice isn't to helpful, I don't bame you, just another aiza zogger who doesn't really know half the story.
You're an unbelievable person to have such emunah as a frum Jew - the fact that you're single having nothing to do w/ it.
We should all have such goals and that feeling of purpose as we live our life as Jews. Thanks for an inspirational post.
Actually, the person who suggested doing something about the beard may have a beard. Another post of yours is directed at women who are very overweight...that they should go on diets and try to improve their looks. The same applies to men. Sure, fat women may get married even without losing weight. It is just more difficult. And sloppy, old looking guys who are looking for wives young enough to have a couple kids may also find a bride, but again...it is just harder.
Incidentally--coming from a single woman who is (indeed!) trying to lose weight.
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