A reply to a girls blog on another shiduch blogger

I am a Bochur of over 40, my younger siblings are B"H married & have kids & learn in Eretz Yisroel. I was a better learner than them, but my situation forced me to work. I try to help in tuition fees for my YOUNGER brother's kids.
I always tell my father that: the fact my clock stopped, doesn't mean Klal Yisroel should stop, and certainly not my younger brothers.
Yes people are mean. Imagine having to daven with out a Talis & being the oldest one in Shul, with a graying beard. Yes every day!
Do I get broken, I am human, I am sensitive, and I find it hard to forgive sometimes.
However how you can let your guard down like that?
WE don’t run the world, nor do we understand why we came here, who said we were brought here to have a family & children, of course we want one.
Stop and think, maybe not have children and accepting the L-ord’s decree is more choshuv by HKB”H, than having a family & children. HKB”H can show the world that he is boss through you. See Tania (IGERES HAKODESH 11, BTW I AM NOT A CHABADNIC).
Just use common sense alone; what do you gain by being depressed or jealous does it bring you any good? It ruins you. Who wants to marry a depressed bitter jealous lady/or man for that matter?
Get out of your rut!! Break yourself to help others, “Fagin” Fagin & Fagin again. You will feel better, & you see Yeshuas Hashem Kehref Ayin.
Remember your real Tachlis is to want what Hashem wants for you.
HKB”H doesn’t need your help, and knows a lot better than you what is good for you. When you say Krias Shema be Mekabel Oil Malchus Shomayim, and be prepared to die any death or [not even die] suffer any suffering to sanctify the name of the L-ord. Mean what you say, and think how lucky you really are to go through “Busha “[embarrassment] equivalent to Shfichas Domim [murder] so as to sanctify the name of the L-ord.
Think of all the times you died out of embarrassment, and you still accept the L-ord’s judgments & decrees.
How many of your happily married friends could really mean Shema Yisroel like you could? How much Nachas you give HKB”H from your Shema more than Malochim & Serofim.
Why feel empty you are the world & the world stands on you? You have a private agreement between you & HKB”H. “Btach Bashem Vasei Tov Shchon Boretz Ureah Emuna”.
That is how I feel, [a Bochur over 40] it is very likely I have been rejected by you based on my age, never the less I am not bitter. I pray please HKB”H don’t let the situation rule me, let me continue to rule it.

Relax be cool calm & collective

Boys must sleep enough & be relaxed. Those yeshivas who shelve five bochyrim in a dorm room for 16K a year, are good entrepeners, but....
If some one has never before in his life slept in such conditions, & under such stress is meant to learn all day, be diturbed & deprived sleep all night with people comming in & out smoking, shmoozing & boozing with loud music.
I think they may get more sleep in a jail cell & it is a lot less expensive, and possibly won't destroy the shiduch as much as a dorm room.
Come on Vintage Jeans!

Boys must sleep enough & be relaxed

Another Shiduch Problem

People imagine or reckon that older singles are less picky or at least have to be so. So they will recomenend a girl 5 ' 3" 250 pounds age 30 to a boy 5' 7" 150 pounds, andc expect it to work. The answer to that is, that if it disturbed him at 20 & 30 you could be sure at 40 it for sure disturbs him.
A suggestion to the girl:
I know that you are depressed & from rolling out of bed in the morning to dropping in at night you need 100 snacks & three good oily meals or else life is really not worth living. I cannot contemplate your depression, because I am not living through what you are.
However you don't get a second chance for a first impression. If you are really interested ingetting married, don't take the guy who no one else will take & who doesn't really want you. You and him will regret that move and it may be to late to rectify. Go for diet councelling and exerscize, it will be very painful at first, but as you see progress you will feel good with yourself, keep yourself busy other than eating & chew on lettace as your snacks.
Wait until you loose that 100 or 120 pounds dress as well as you possibly ccould before meeting that boy, and be confedent about your looks before and during your meeting. Think about the future and forget about the past.
Go with that possitive feeling this is it. Don't try to impress him, be yourself, and don't let on, how much you are dying for him.